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50 - Nightmare/Night Mare

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NIGHT MARE - power
the dream you fear runs over you
the dream you mount carries you

At night: I run, I ache, I burn. Running through dense undergrowth, among dark woods. Pursued. I sense the pursuer. A hunting cat. Closing quickly. I will not escape. My body strains and trembles. I sense my death. I am afraid. What kind of cat is this? asks another, detached part of my mind. Is it a tiger? No, it is not a tiger. Is it a panther? No, it is not a panther. Is it a leopard? No, it is not a leopard. Unconcerned with my own impending doom, the torment of nerves and musculature, some objective part of my mind seeks the name of the cat.

I have entered a clearing. I stumble. I fall. On my knees, I am too weak to rise. I hear, sense, feel the cat gather itself, begin its leap - .

Is it a jaguar? No, it is not a jaguar. Is it a lion? No, it is not a lion. Is it a cougar? No, it is not a cougar.

The cat is in the air now. Behind me, flying, descending. I await the tearing of my flesh.

Is it a lynx? Yes, it is a lynx.

The cat is in the air. I am rising, leaping also, turning, twisting. I see the eyes, the claws, the teeth. My eyes are also narrowed, my teeth bared, my claws outstretched. We whirl toward each other - .

Face to face, then face through face. Our bodies pass through each other. We fall to the ground, side-by-side. We are running now, together. Through the southwest of the United States, into Mexico, and Central America. Running back in time. Filled with power. Running. Tireless. Seeking something.

The dream changes. The nightmare is gone. The cat is gone. I ride the Night Mare.

In Native traditions, horse is a totem of power. Mare is a female horse. When we separate from earth, the feminine, the body, our daily activity and consciousness may hold that separated power at bay. But when our defenses are down, it will return to us. If we resist, the energy runs over us. But if we recognize it as ourselves, mount and ride, the power once again becomes our own.

Cat – traditional symbol of the feminine, and of the body. Horse - totem of power. Mare - a female horse. NIGHT MARE - the dreaming power of the feminine.

This card is a reminder that whatever we fear is only our own power separated from us. Hair flying free, ride the Night Mare!

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Angelynx. A divination deck. John Sacelli. Chris Deschaine.